In every African village, there lives a certain brown dog. You don’t own him. He just… exists. He answers to no one. But somehow, everyone calls him the same thing:
Bosco.
No one really remembers who named him, or when. One day, he just trotted into the compound, tail up, ears torn from past life battles, and took up residence like he pays rent. Spoiler alert: He does not.
He is:
- Not yours.
- Not theirs.
- But somehow, everyone’s dog.
He’s just there.
Every day. Every season. Every function.
Certified Foodie & Event Planner
If there’s food, Bosco is already seated. Bosco’s diet is legendary. He eats anything. And I mean anything.
- Ugali with no soup? Yes.
- Burnt rice? Delicious!.
- Bones? Obviously.
- Soap water? He’ll try it.
- That leftover chapati that fell in the dirt during Christmas lunch in 2016? Still remembers the flavor.
- Leftover ice cream wrapper? The wrapper is the meal.
If you’re ever hungry on campus or in the village, the trick is simple:
Follow Bosco. He will lead you to nourishment.
Where he is, food is. Wedding? There. Funeral? Front row. Graduation party? Already licking the plates.
Also: Bosco has eaten more nyama choma than you, and he didn’t contribute a cent.
He is the uninvited guest who never brings a gift, but always leaves with a full stomach.
He doesn’t RSVP. He doesn’t dress up.
But best believe, he never misses a single event.
Weddings. Funerals. Baby showers.
He’s even been spotted at Zoom prayer meetings.
How? No one knows.
The Real Village CCTV
Don’t let the casual walk and tired eyes fool you. Bosco is the village watchman. He sees everything:
He saw:
- The chairlady stealing soda at the fundraiser.
- Pastor’s son sneaking out of youth kesha with someone’s daughter.
- He knows who peed behind the church during the night vigil.
And guess what? He told no one. Bosco doesn’t talk, but he knows things. And the thing is? He says nothing.
He just lies there, watching. Judging.
Silently collecting receipts like a furry gossip blog.
Healthcare? Bosco Said “LOL”
No vaccines. No check-ups. Not even deworming. His immune system is sponsored by ancient African herbs and raw resilience. Science fears him.
Bosco has:
- Been hit by a bicycle twice.
- Bitten by two other dogs.
- Swallowed an entire chapati with a toothpick still in it.
And survived.
Meanwhile your expensive indoor chihuahua gets the flu because the air conditioner was too cold.
Bosco’s only medical plan is: “Drink water. Sleep under the table. Wake up fine.”
Cultural Icon
Kids play with him. Aunties feed him.
Comrades use him as a food signal:
“Bro, Bosco is heading that way, the food must be ready!”
He appears in all group photos.
He’s been to more weddings than you.
He even attended your graduation and appears in the background of your graduation photos. Yet… he asks for nothing.
No leash. No collar. Just vibes. And leftovers.
Uninvited. But in focus.
The OG
While imported high maintenance dogs named “Fluffy” and “Max” are out here attending therapy and eating gluten-free doggie-treats, Bosco is living his best life on crumbs, chaos, and community affection.
Long live Bosco!
Bosco has seen all the night runners and he don’t tell😆